As home to the reigning Division I men’s lacrosse champs, the rest of DU’s student body has a lot to live up to. One of the best ways we can show our school spirit is by tailgating (selfless, I know). Though we may not get elective credit for partaking, tailgating is an art, some might even say a science—the kind that comes before you learn why a paperclip floats, but a science nonetheless. Some people take it to the next level with couches, grills and TVs, but in college, you don’t need any of that to arrive at the state where the game itself becomes completely unimportant. All a Pioneer needs to have a good time at a tailgate are beer, Boone and to avoid adopting any of these personas.

Guy or girl who pounds it back because they can’t drink in the venue

You know the one—they pack an entire week of drinking into two hours because they refuse to be sobered up by halftime. Likely to chug four consecutive shots as you’re leaving and run into the crowd shoeless. If you’re able to keep track of them long enough to make it to the stadium, you’d better hold onto their sleeve and be prepared to apologize profusely to the fans around you. Expect him or her to be taken out of the game in handcuffs.

“There is no possible way that we will lose” guy or girl

“Get out of my tailgate if you have even a shred of doubt that we won’t destroy (insert opposing team name here). If you think even so much that the score will be close, I will spend the entire time glaring at you with repulsion.” This person likely thinks the other team is comprised solely of Satan’s spawn and is very liberal with the use of their middle fingers.

Guy or girl who thinks Boone is an actual celebrity

Admit it, we’ve all been this person at one time or another. After all, Boone’s sole purpose is to get you pumped for a game; but this isn’t Disney World and you aren’t five—even if you do revert back to similar behavior after a drink or two. One should not scream “Boone” at the top of his or her lungs and injure upwards of seven innocent tailgaters in an effort to reach him for a picture. On that note, Boone is awesome, and a picture with him at a tailgate is absolutely essential to your DU career; just make sure you behave appropriately when encountering the most popular Pioneer on campus.

Overconfident person who thinks they should play dizzy bat

Undoubtedly the most dangerous, three vodka lemonades and this person becomes a menace when wielding anything other than a sippy cup—much less a bat. And yet they think it’s a solid idea to further impair their reflexes and swing a weapon within close proximity of other drunk and oblivious people. Fortunately, they often manage to hit only themselves with the bat and still think they succeeded.

Now that you know how not to act, you can enjoy the next tailgate without offending or annoying your fellow Pios.