How much do you know about the lives of college students? If your child is heading off to college and you never attended to yourself, you might think that you don’t know very much at all. Conversely, if you remember your college days, you might assume you know everything necessary. Neither of these assumptions is probably true. For parents in the former situation, there are dynamics of college life that will still be familiar to you, for those in the latter situation, remember that there’s a danger in assuming that everything will be just as you remember it.

It’s Expensive

Whatever you remember about costs from your college days probably doesn’t apply anymore. Certainly, the overall cost of living has skyrocketed, but tuition has also outpaced inflation at a big rate. Working your way through college just isn’t as feasible as they once were. This means more students must take out loans, but those can be hard to get. In fact, many students may not qualify for this critical assistance because they lack a credit history. This is why your child or even someone else may have asked you for assistance with paying for higher education to be a co-signer. You probably are already aware that this is a position with responsibilities, but you might not be familiar with how far that responsibility extends or understand what your rights as a cosigner would be. You can review the answers to these and other questions in a guide about cosigning.

You Can’t Choose Their Major

While it’s true that as a parent you do have the experience and wisdom to guide them toward a good choice, there are variables you aren’t considering. One is that as much as you may believe you’re an objective source of advice, you aren’t. Your own experiences and assumptions will color your suggestions. Maybe you want to beg them not to major in fine arts and do something practical instead, but just because you ended up not doing anything with your degree in sculpture doesn’t mean they won’t. Conversely, if you studied accounting because your parents made you and hated every second of it, it doesn’t follow that your kid will feel the same way. You can help them set goals and offer your perspective on their choices but also make it clear that it is their choice in the end.

They’ll Do Things That Worry You

Not only will they do things that worry you, but you won’t even know about some of them, and that’s one of the corollaries to this in they are on their way to independent adulthood. Of course, it can be hard to let go, especially if you had a very close relationship when they lived at home, but keep in mind that becoming their own person is an important developmental stage and means that you’ve been a successful parent. Even if they need to pull away for a while, there’s no reason you can’t become closer again in the future.