You might not be surprised to learn that the word with the most synonyms in the English language is “drunk.” Such a popular activity rightfully has an excessive number of terms to refer to it. According to James Hareck, the author of the word blog “Sesquiotica,” “drunk” has upwards of 300 synonyms. Some of the many include zonked, tomahawked, bent and, most recently, “shmacked.” This last word originates from a recent phenomenon that is sweeping the country, starting riots amongst the nation’s top and largest party universities.
The business “I’m Shmacked” has been producing so-called “documentaries” of college life that highlight parties, drinking and hyper-sexualized young women. This is misrepresenting the reality of college life as well as encouraging a misconception about the purpose of pursuing higher education. We need to reclaim our educational integrity; even here at DU, many students could use a reminder as to the value of our education.
“I’m Shmacked” began as a group of irresponsible students from Lower Merion High School in Philadelphia recording their friends and themselves getting drunk and high. It has since turned into a multi-million dollar business (profiting from ticket sales for the parties and investors) that produced twenty-three videos in one year alone and has over one hundred thousand followers on Facebook. Jeffrie Ray and Arya Toufanian, the founders and CEOs, hop from campus to campus, hosting parties, hatching schemes, hanging loose, hunting hotties and hollering “I’m Shmacked” everywhere they go. Ray told The New York Times he thinks they have initiated a positive movement that is promoting schools and he stated that, “I have had about 30 kids say they ended up at a school because of my video.” In their 2013 Fall Recap, even students all the way from Ireland said these videos encouraged them to attend university in the States. And we thought our international reputation couldn’t get any worse.
According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA) each year 1,825 students die of alcohol-related incidents, more than 690,000 are assaulted by other inebriated students, more than 97,000 are victims of alcohol-related sexual assault and more than 150,000 develop alcohol-related health problems. In the aforementioned The New York Times article, Mary Jo Desprez, an administrator at the collegiate recovery program at the University of Michigan, stated “‘I’m Shmacked’ limits students’ imagination of what fun can be without drugs and drinking.” Can we really not find other ways to entertain ourselves? How about laser tag, roller-skating, Jumpstreet Indoor Trampoline Park, Elitch Gardens Amusement Park or even just watching the DUPB movie?
One DU pamphlet for parents entitled “You, Your College Student, and Alcohol” says the following: “Students perceive their peers to be drinking much more than they actually do.”
Here at DU, a third of students reported they did not drink at all in the last 30 days and sixty-five percent reported that they do not binge drink. DU was fortunate to be bypassed by “I’m Shmacked” when it visited CU Boulder in 2012; nevertheless, we have our own concentrated population of subscribers to the “shmacked” culture.
When you are paying upwards of $55,000 dollars to gain a private, privileged and powerful education you have better things to do with your time. Each hour of a DU class comes in at about eight-hundred-and-fifty dollars; bet you never realized your hangover was so expensive. If you’re getting “Shmacked” three to seven times a week you need a “Shmack” in the face. We’re not here to get “Shmacked,” we’re here to get smart.
