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It’s not just that “A History of Violence” is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It’s worse that critics can slap some asinine tags on it to convince gullible viewers that it is some sort of masterpiece.The film, which received through-the-roof ratings from critics (an 8.1 on the Internet Movie Database and an 89 percent “fresh” rating on Rotten Tomatoes), is a film that has no artistic value. Apart from the overly graphic violence, enough unnecessary gore to make me physically sick to my stomach, the film’s embarrassing sex scenes and out of place comedy breaks left me at a loss for words.How can a critic say that this movie is “good?” How can a critic rationalize a five-minute oral sex scene with stars Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello that will embarrass or offend audiences everywhere by saying that it was “realistic?”Everyone has heard the argument that people are desensitized to violence and nobody wants to hear it anymore. People are and nothing can change that. But, critics, isn’t there somewhere you have to draw the line? Whatever the point of this film was, whatever redeeming value there was supposed to be (I guess Mortensen’s son in the movie was funny), was lost in an appalling two hours of wanton gore and tragic dialogue. Yet, critics can feed audience manure like “It’s a savage film that questions its savagery every step of the way and asks its audience to consider the costs of ‘Dirty Harry’ diplomacy writ large” (Glenn Whipp, Los Angeles Daily News). What’s worse than Whipp’s spewing of unworthy praise? People actually buy this crap.I will hear someone quote me the same garbage tomorrow. People whose opinions I respect will say things like that because it’s not OK to not understand a movie anymore.Let me lay it out for you: nothing happens in this film. This movie is about nothing.There was no method to this madness expect one thing: director David Cronenberg knows that, put enough violence and sex in a movie, add high school and a cheerleader outfit, and pass it off as some comment on vigilantism and people with lap it up like a bunch of cats licking milk. Consider David Lynch’s “Mulholland Drive.” The guy actually came out and said that the whole thing makes no sense. Yet, people still try to tell me they understood what he meant. He meant nothing. He said it.If you love graphic violence and awkward sex scenes, and your favorite porno got stepped on last week, go see “A History of Violence.”If you think it’s funny when a script is as bad as this one is, and you don’t want to take my word for it, go see “A History of Violence.” If you’re at gunpoint and you have to go see “A History of Violence,” I guess that’s fine. Just don’t try to say that it changed your life, or that it was some great comment on society. If there’s a comment on society, it’s how ridiculous it is that a movie like this can actually open in theaters and be praised by so many critics.

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