I’m not funny. I’ve never been. As a matter of fact, I’m one of those people who takes an extra 0.6 seconds to get a joke and ends up laughing after everyone else. But when I, at the prime of my 18 years of age and DU-bound, asked my mother how I was supposed to make new friends, she answered, “Just be yourself!” Gee. Thanks a lot, Mom.
Two years later, I did — miraculously — manage to make some friends in college. And even though I ever-so-often find myself questioning their sanity, friends do make your college experience a lot nicer. In the spirit of the new school year, here’s a list composed of my third-year expertise in friendship-making (and breaking) on how to actually make friends.
- You’re not going to find friends in the wild. This is not pokémon, kid. There are about 13,000 people on this campus. Do you actually think you’re going to stumble upon your best friend on your walk to Sturm in the crack of dawn? Do yourself a favor and join a club.
- Put in effort. My mom wasn’t totally wrong when she told me to be myself, but I can’t just expect people to instantly understand my awesomeness. Neither should you. Finding your group takes time, so be prepared to step out of your comfort zone.
- Be nice to people. No, actually. Just like you, there are a lot of freshmen (and sophomores, juniors, and seniors) out there who are terrified of social interaction and scared of being completely alone through four years of college. Being nice to someone else (like saying “Hi” in the hallways and classrooms) can make you a friend. Don’t push it though. Overly nice people can be annoying too.
- Be prepared for rejection. Relationships are hard. People will think you’re weird and you will think other people are weird. It’s part of the process. Not everyone will want to be your friend, and that’s totally okay. You’re an adult now (or at least should act like one) and it’s okay to pick and choose your friendships.
- Don’t over-stress it. It’s okay if you don’t find friends right away. At the end of the day, you are here to study, and friendships, more often than not, happen naturally. While you’re still looking for your newest best friend(s), you can try the amazing restaurants off-campus, go to the mountains, write for the Clarion and do those readings I know you’ve been procrastinating for days now.