“What are you doing after you graduate?” This question has plagued every college senior since the dawn of higher education. As a graduating senior getting a degree in film studies and production, my answer has remained the same all year: “I’m planning on taking a really long nap.”
But as I approach my last couple weeks at DU, I’ve realized it’s about time to really figure things out. To help me decide my future plans, I turn to the voice of our generation: BuzzFeed. Using ten of BuzzFeed’s most valuable quizzes, I chart my future course.
“Which Hogwarts House do you belong in?”
My result: Hufflepuff
Knowing your Hogwarts House is like knowing your zodiac sign: it’s a set of personality traits to fall back on in times of crisis. As a Hufflepuff, I’m supposed to be loyal, hard-working, kind and patient. Before I set out into the real world, I’ll at least now know what kind of person I’m aiming to be. (Note of caution: BuzzFeed’s sorting quiz is not always accurate; for the real deal, head over to Pottermore, the official Harry Potter online experience.)
“Where in the U.S. should you travel to next?”
My result: Las Vegas, Nevada
Some seniors plan on taking time off after graduation to travel a little bit before going to grad school or getting a job at daddy’s company—maybe I should do the same. I’ve always wanted to go on a road trip, and what better destination than that place from “The Hangover,” the butt crack of the Southwest, the cultural capital of these United States: Las Vegas. Perfect.
“What should you do after you graduate?”
My result: Go to grad school
After my lovely road trip to Vegas, maybe I’ll be reminded why higher education is important. BuzzFeed tells me to go back to school, so who am I to argue? Maybe with another degree I’ll finally land some kind of career—but doing what?
“What career should you actually have?”
My result: Humanitarian
Perfectly in line with my Hufflepuff self, BuzzFeed suggests I become a humanitarian. I’m not entirely sure what that entails, but I’m on board with saving the world and helping out my fellow humans. Step one: down with the patriarchy.
“What city should you actually live in?”
My result: Paris
Maybe not the most convenient and cost-effective option, but who cares? C’est Paris! There’s culture, there’s food, there’s fashion—if I’m going to save the world, I might as well eat well and look good. Besides, I love bread, so there’s really no version of this that doesn’t work out.
“Which pop star should be your best friend?”
My result: Beyoncé
Not only do I get to live in Paris and have an endless supply of baguettes, but I also get to hang out with Beyoncé? Sounds like a pretty flawless life to me.
“Which British actor is your soul mate?”
My result: Andrew Garfield (“The Amazing Spider-Man”)
Now that he’s free of both Emma Stone and the latest “Spider-man” film series, Andrew Garfield has plenty of time to join me for a wonderful life in Paris. Between my efforts to destroy the patriarchy and his film career, we’ll live the perfect European life. #Blessed
“How many kids should you have?”
My result: One
Looks like Andrew Garfield and I will be welcoming little Spider-Man Jr. into the world. Growing up in Paris won’t be so bad either—our kid could be tri-lingual, speaking French, real English and American English.
“Which dream house should you actually live in?”
My result: An underwater suite in the Maldives
As a general rule, every French family who is best friends with Beyoncé needs an exotic vacation home. In case our life in Paris gets way too fabulous, Andrew, Spider-Man Jr. and I will have an underwater home in the Maldives to help pass the time.
My result: The Caribbean
After a long, successful career dismantling the patriarchy from my humble abode in Paris and raising Spider-Man Jr. to carry on the family legacy, I need a place to retire. The Caribbean is the perfect spot for relaxation—maybe Andrew and I will get a resort home in the Bahamas. Whatever the case, it’s sure to be sheer bliss.
If you’re like me and still unsure what the future holds, take these BuzzFeed quizzes to ease your mind. Sure, it’s just a bunch of silly results, but they are all just as likely to happen as any other plans you might make. Life is full of twists, turns and Beyoncé, and no one ever really knows what comes next. So the next time someone asks what you’re doing after you graduate, just tell them you plan on being happy. In the end, that’s the only real decision we need to make.
