I’ve never been a coach in my life, but if Sidelines Pub were on my team I would sit it square on the bench.
“Where can we watch college or pro football?” I was asked the other day by one of my friends. “Not at Sidelines that’s all I know,” I replied.
During my second day on campus I decided to check out this supposedly “cool” hangout and what is our only sit-down restaurant on campus.
“Yo man,” I hollered at one of the employees “you guys opening at 11 on Sunday for the Broncos-Bengals game.” He looked at me like I had eight-heads and responded “we’re not open on Saturday or Sunday.”
What kind of restaurant, but more importantly, sports bar, isn’t open on the weekends? That is like having a sandwich without anything in between the bread or a book without words on the pages. It just makes no sense.
Sidelines’ terrible effort to accommodate the student body as a sit-down restaurant goes mostly unnoticed by many, but not this angry freshman. As an obsessively crazed sports addict I need an on campus location to watch sports with my friends other than the dining halls, which is insufficient do to noise, lack of seats and only two TV’s.
Most importantly, watching the game in the cafeteria means your chomping down on some mess hall grub rather than devouring some delicious chicken wings or a REAL juicy and well prepared cheeseburger.
Because Sidelines has dropped the ball completely the entire team (student body) must suffer for the rest of the season. Instead of staying on campus and simply swiping our DU ID card, students now must linger off-campus bars to watch the game and pay for food with cash, not meal plan money.
“O’ come on now Coach Coulter” a player might say to me “don’t bench Sidelines this soon into the season, give him another chance. After all you can still watch Monday night games there.” To this I say with resounding “No.”
Sidelines must stay on the sidelines. If it takes an entire year to get the lesson through so be it. Nothing can change my mind on this matter. No being able to watch Monday Night Football. No World Series baseball (which will be played during the week very soon). No regular season hockey and basketball when they begin, because all of this doesn’t change the fact that on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon “Sidelines” will remain closed.
That is just not acceptable.
We, as a team of students, need a reliable player (Pub) to be able to sit down at and help us take a load off after a week of long, strenuous classes.
The sad reality is that our potential superstar would rather be a pre-Madonna and sit on the bench the whole year, which isn’t good news for me as a coach.
Now, because of these selfish and unbeknownst actions, I’m going to need to come up with a new game plan on how to help sports fans on campus defeat stress from the week on Saturday and Sunday afternoons.
Enjoy the bench Sidelines.
